Where it all began
by anothercasualty
Summary: We knew it was wrong. We didn’t care. We did it anyway. Nothing else mattered.
1. Prologue

I own nothing.

Instant Star is owned by ….uh….let me get back to you about that.

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Prologue 

I sat in the back row of the court room, picking at my newly painted bright pink finger nails. Tears were pooling in my eyes but no one could see them, thanks partly to my oversized glasses and the fact that the room was still half empty. As the paint started to give way, it landed on my new black suit pants and I mechanically wiped the chips away. Yes, I was not dressed in traditional Jude Harrison Fashion of ripped jeans and vintage tee, but in a suit with blazer and white blouse. I was even wearing a large black floppy hat that could shield me from almost everything. This new identity is that of Maryse Dutois. The only way to try and fix this problem was for me to stay low for a while, so the name changed, the clothes disappeared, the polish went from black to pink, the hair from blonde to chocolate brown. Even my star ring was gone, replaced by an engagement-looking ring on my ring finger. To be Maryse Dutois, I had to become her.

I noticed movement to my right, where people were starting to file into the court room. I watched as both my parents walked by, although divorced, they have managed to become united during this "humiliating" time for them, followed by Sadie and my recent ex, Spiedermen. Strange they were walking together, but I figured Tommy and I really screwed them over royally and they were able to find solace in each other. Next came Jamie, Wally, and Kyle, who were only there to support Speid. Kwest walked in, in his own tailored suit, and just as I suspected, he sat on my side of the court room, while the rest of the group choose to sit at the front of the prosecuting side. I was thankful someone was on my side.

I knew my choice of clothing would be perfect. This was the final day in court and the jurors were to make their decision. Everyone was dressed to the nines. The rows were starting to fill fast as an older looking man sat next to me. He was another reporter trying to get the final verdict along with the rest of us. I am sure if I counted there would be more than 30 different reporters, journalists or paparazzi in this crowed room. Once everyone had found a spot to sit or a wall to lean against, people started whispering and hushing, wanting for the defendant to enter. The door opened, and the defending counselor, Mr.Patterson, stepped into the room, followed by Tom, who was dressed as he had been everyday in court for the last three months, in a pristine suit with a tie that matched his electric blue eyes. I will have to thank Portia for that. He quickly looked over in my direction knowing where to find me. He did and gave a slight smile, but he continued to look around, not wanting to draw attention to me. I fought my own smile and slowly exhaled, trying to remind myself that we would survive this.

Tom stood up, ready to hear the reading of the verdict.

"Mr. Thomas Quincy, the jurors have finally come to the decision that, in the case of the statutory rape of one Miss. Jude Harrison, you are found……

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So this is my first fan fiction and I am beyond nervous. Hopefully at least one person likes it.

Also, If anyone is interested, I'm looking for someone to spell check and make sure it all makes sense.

Constructive Critisim is always appreciated.


	2. Chapter 1

I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 1 

_**We sign our cards and letters BFF  
You've got a million ways to make me laugh  
**_

I jumped out of the viper as we pulled up to the pier. I had been struggling to put a song together for a week now and Tommy suggested that we go back to the beginning and get some inspiration. I whole heartedly agreed. I took a seat on the bench and started strumming a tune on my Gibson. I looked up and giggled as Tommy shivered from the cold October air. His nose was already starting to turn pink.

"I told you to bring an extra sweater for a reason Quincy!" I said with a smirk on my face.

"You did not!"

"Well, that's what I implied."

"'Its nice weather' is not implying to bring a sweater!"

"I was being sarcastic you dummy!" I continued to hum a tune while strumming my guitar, "Come sit down, maybe singing will warm you up."

Tommy takes a seat a little to close for comfort and I get the shivers up my spine but he assumes I was shivering from the cold and he scoots even closer. I look up at the sky and notice the black clouds rolling in.

"_I can feel the pressure, its getting closer now…"_ I softly sang and strummed.

"I like it, how bout…._ Were better off with out you_" I nodded and sang it.

I was now staring in his eyes. This song seemed to be about us. The pressure of having to finish this song which was not coming along nicely until now. Perhaps the pressure of our close relationship. Our eye contact broke when a loud clash of thunder roared in the distance and rain started to pelt down on us. I quickly ripped my jacket off to protect my Gibson. I looked up into the angry sky and smiled as the rain soaked my hair and face.

"Jude, lets go!" Tommy stands up and tries to grab my hand but I jerk it away.

"No, wait a minute, I love the rain! Just sit down and enjoy it!"

"Are you crazing? You'll catch pneumonia!" Rains drops were starting to collect on his eyebrows and drip onto his eyelashes and cheeks. His hands were jammed into his leather jacket pockets.

"I'll risk it."

"I'll leave you!"

"You wouldn't dare."

Tom started to walk back to the viper. I slowly got up and walked back to the car taking my sweet time. I did it just to piss him off. I looked up into the sky one last time before climbing into the viper with the guitar between my legs. I wiped away the raindrops that managed to get underneath my jacket and onto my guitar.

I looked over at Tom who was watching me. I noticed he was glancing down at my chest. I also looked down. My t-shirt was soaked and now see through showing off my black bra. I pulled my jacket closer to my chest and I started to shiver while a blush crept up my face. Tommy quickly looked away and started the car.

"I'll take you back to my place to change, it's just down the road."

"K" I looked out the window into the dark sky trying to hide my embarrassment.

By the time we got to Tommy's, the heater had yet to start blowing out hot air and I was shivering. We ran up to his apartment door and he quickly opened it.

"God Jude, you're frozen, let me run a bath for you."

My teeth chattered a response.

While I waited, I looked around the apartment. I had never been here before and I was astonished. The pent house was very modern and simple but elegant all at the same time. One whole side of the apartment was all glass, looking out into the Ontario Lake. There were only a few pictures around. A couple of them were of what I guessed to be family because of the same blue eyes. As I moved down the row of pictures, one caught my eye. It was a picture of him and me from a few weeks ago. I hadn't realized someone had taken a picture of us. We had been discussing songs while sitting on the couch behind the soundboard. I had been complaining about my feet because I had been standing on them all day so he offered to rub them. We were coming up with words that rhymed with 'love sick'. He had come up with 'chick' and 'lick'. I had suggested 'dick' and 'prick'. Both of our eyes had been filled with mischief and humor. It was another memory of the two of us.

"It's ready." Tommy announced breaking me out of my thoughts.

"Thanks." Tommy led me to the bathroom down the hall.

"Wow Quincy, I'm impressed! I don't know if I want to ever leave!" The bathroom was beautiful with marble counters and an extra large shower and separate bath tube. The tube was filled with bubbles. All of a sudden I had the urge to hug him, I will blame it on hormones but I knew deep down that it was the huge crush that I had on him that made me do it. I hugged him as tight as I could, never wanting to let go. At first he stood there, them something clicked and he returned the hug. I was still dripping wet and I realized he had already changed and had on clean clothes, which were now once again wet.

"Oh shit, I'm sorry!"

"Don't worry about it, girl, it will dry."

He left and shut the door behind him. I followed him and locked the door.

I quickly undressed and hung my clothes up in the shower. I made my way back to the bath tube and quickly glanced in the mirror.

"Ugh." My make up was smudged and I looked like some trashy hooker. That's embarrassing.

I started shivering again and quickly made my way to the tub. All of a sudden, I felt my feet slip out from beneath me. My rear end and the back of my head hit the cold marble. Shit. A loud shrill scream left my lungs. Tommy was banging on the door.

"JUDE! Are you OK?"

"Yah, I uh just fell, I'll be fine!" I managed to get up. I felt the back of my head and noticed a goose egg starting to form. I slowly sank in to the warm bubble bath and I finally felt my heart starting to mellow out a bit. My eyes closed and I relaxed.

I quickly awaken to see Tommy's face staring down at me, his hands clenched around my shoulders, trying to shake me awake.

"Jude!"

"W…What? What are you doing?" I couldn't remember what had happened. After a second, it all came back to me. I tried to cover myself up with my arms covering my chest while drawing my legs up to my chin. Tommy was trying hard not to look.

"You fell asleep, you've been in there forever."

Tommy grabbed a towel and held it up and I stood up, while he wrapped it around me, looking away from me. I noticed that the door had been taken off of its hinges.

"What time is it?"

"About four'ish."

I stepped out of the bath precariously and I stopped and thought about what I was supposed to change into. Thank god for Tommy.

"Here, I brought you a pair of my boxers and a t-shirt."

"Thanks."

Tommy left and I stared at my wet bra and panties. I turned around and put the boxers and shirt on. There was no point putting wet clothing on underneath dry clothing. I made my way back down the hall until I spotted a bedroom. Tommy's bedroom. I quickly glanced in and noticed the appealing bed. I padded over to it and pulled the comforter back and hopped in, snuggling deeper in to familiar scent of Tommy.

"What are you doing?"

"Sleeping."

"Its four o'clock."

"So?"

"I don't think so, we gotta finish that song."

"Later."

I felt the bed dip a bit and cold air hit me when the covers got pulled up. I tried to snuggle in deeper to prevent being pulled out, so I was shocked when I felt a presence beside and no one was dragging me out kicking and screaming. His body was as stiff as a board.

"Relax Tom Tom." Tommy immediately softened and scooted closer. He pulled me closer and it felt good, almost too good.

_**You're lookin' out for me; you've got my back  
It's so good to have you around**_

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Thanks so much for the reviews. Truly means the world!

This chapter goes back to the beginning and it will continue from there. Jude has gotten back from her first tour a couple months previous and she is working on her next album, but the Jamie/Jude thing never happened. Tommy and Sadie never dated. Hopefully the rest will be explained later on.

Also, I realize that in Instant Star, Jude and Tommy actually go to a wharf to practice 24 hours, but I don't like the word wharf so I'm using pier instead.

I will try to post every Saturday.

True friend is Miley Cyrus'.

**Preview**

_He was finally giving in._

_My fingers were still intertwined with Tommy's but I couldn't handle it anymore._

"_Jude, what happened? You're soaked."_


	3. Chapter 1 Part 2

I own nothing.

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Chapter 1 Part 2 

_**They say temptation will destroy our love**_

_**The never ending hunger**_

_**But I fear**_

_**I have nothing to give**_

_**I have so much to lose**_

I woke to someone breathing down my neck. I remembered where I was and who I was with. A smile spread across my face. I turned over and looked up at Tommy's sweet sleeping face. The movement must have woken him. He was looking down at me. My nose was at his mouth and he gently kissed me on the tip, my eyes fluttered at the sensation. I daringly reached up, making contact with his lips softly, waiting for a response. I pulled back when I realized he wasn't going to. I shrivelled back rejected, not wanting to make eye contact, but his large hands stopped me. They cupped around my head and he leaned in stopping a breath away before pressing his lips into mine, pushing them into my teeth. I kissed back, my lips moving with his until he was begging for entrance, the tip of his tongue gliding between my lips and I obeyed. His hands had moved down and they were now grazing across my back underneath my shirt. I scooted closer to him. All my thoughts went out the door. He was finally giving in.

My shirt was being tugged over my head and I saw the yearning his eyes after he had pulled it over. He stared down at my naked chest, then proceeded to kiss each taut nipple, moving on to the valley between my breast and working his way back up, peppering kisses all the way. I laid there unsure of what to do, my mind drawing blanks. Was he aware that I had never done this before? I didn't want to seem naïve or incapable, so I started out small, my fingers running down his chest and working my way down, touching, grazing, groping, stroking.

I didn't care at that moment whether he would regret it later. This was what I wanted, what I had been craving for since that kiss on my birthday. Although the memories of the aftermath of the kiss were awful, the sensation of the kiss still floated through my head almost everyday. It had been full of passion and desire much like these ones. My body was aching for him and nothing was going to stop me now.

Clothes were being pulled off a fairly modest pace. We were taking our time. He rolled me back over and he hovered over me. I was waiting for the desire in his eyes to disappear and turn into regret but it never happened. His smile calmed me and all I was feeling was excitement. He reached into the small draw beside the bed and grabbed a condom. I watched him with curiosity. Nervously, I opened my thighs which were slightly shaking, where he settled, his erection pressing into my folds. His eyes bore into mean looking for something, probably hesitance but I knew he wouldn't find any. He entered me smoothly and he swallowed my gasp. We laid connected for a few seconds as I became accustomed to him. When I the painful feeling subsided, I pushed my hips into his. His fingers intertwined with mine and we moved slowly and fervently together. I responded instinctively, meeting his thrust, trying to get as close as possible. Our sure movements became super slow as we both tried to fight ecstasy from taking over, trying to keep the pleasure as long as possible. Heat was flowing through my body like I was having hot flashes. Sweat was dripping off of his chest, landing on my own.

My fingers were still intertwined with Tommy's but I couldn't handle it anymore. I needed him closer. I undid our hands and I grabbed his back, digging my finger nails in, my legs that were tightly wrapped around his waist pulled him even further into me, my hips pushing back into him. My head was arched back, over come with pleasure. His hands moved to my hips, where they created bruises as he guided me. I had the courage to look into his eyes and my 'look' was still plastered on his face. I let out a shaky smile while small tears tumbled down the sides of my cheeks from the pleasure and overwhelming sensation of it all. He noticed and kissed them away, returning my smile. He continued thrusting into me and our movements started becoming more erratic. Our orgasms took over seconds later. It was a whole new feeling for me, one that I was going to want, again and again. He laid on top of me looking into my face, and all I saw was desire and love. He rolled over and got up and went to the bathroom. I felt empty and cold without him but he quickly returned. He climbed back into the bed still naked and curled me up into his arms.

"Are you okay?" he whispered into my hair. I nodded in response, my breathing was still ragged. His breathing steadied and I knew he had fallen asleep. I was too wide awake to fall asleep again. Thoughts ran wild through my head. Did he think this was a dream? Would he take it all back and tell me it never happened? Or would he finally admit his feelings for me? What did this all mean? Would our relationship change from best friends to nothing, killing everything that we had together? I laid there playing with the hairs on his arm that was wrapped around my waist, hoping that this would be the beginning.

"_Papa don't preach, I'm in trouble deep" _woke me up and I laid there for a second recalling all the earlier happenings. A smile spread across my face until I realized my phone was ringing.

"_Papa don't preach, I've been losing sleep" _I quickly glanced at the clock and jumped out of bed trying to find my phone that had been knocked off the table from prior events. I found it under a pair of boxers.

"Hello?" I asked into the phone.

"Do you know what time it is young lady?"

"I am so sorry, me and Tommy found inspiration and got lost in the music and we lost track of time, he's driving me home right now." I manage to get this all out, hoping she would buy it. She does. She never was the smartest cookie.

"Just call me if you're going to be out this late."

"K Mom."

I hung up and realized Tom was looking at me. A rather naked me.

"Uh, that was my mom; you should probably get me home." I didn't know what else to say.

"Oh ya sure." He was still concentrating on my body. I quickly grabbed his shirt off the floor and threw it on and I swiftly moved out of the bedroom and to the bath to retrieve my still soaking clothing. I pulled my hair into a messy bun and walked to the front door to wait for him.

He exited his bedroom fully dressed and grabbed his keys off the table and headed towards me. I got nervous for a second, thinking that he will tell me to that it never happened but he didn't. He swung the door open and held it for me as I walked out.

We hopped into the viper and not a word was said between the two of us. I felt a little strange. Maybe because a certain area was rather tender or maybe it was the weirdly comfortable silence that was engulfing us. Whatever the cause, I liked it. He pulled up beside my house and I looked over at him. Nothing was coming to my head. I just stared at him. He just stared at me. He suddenly cleared his throat.

"See you tomorrow. Try to be there before 9 please."

"Uh sure." What was I to say? Thank you for taking my virginity? "See you tomorrow." At that I hopped out of the car and made a wild dash to the door as it was still pouring down with rain. I walked inside and my mother and Sadie were sitting on the couch watching TV. They quickly looked up at me when they heard the door close.

"Jude, what happened? You're soaked."

"Its raining hard, this is all from Tommy's car to the door, Crazy huh?" Wow I was bad liar.

"You should change before you catch something." Apparently not, according to my mother.

I headed up the stairs and into my room. I put my stuff down and fell backwards onto my bed. I wasn't tired at all. I pulled out my guitar, fiddling with some melodies that had been bouncing around in my head.

_**Here in this lonely place**_

_**Tangled up in our embrace**_

_**There's nothing I'd like**_

_**Better than to fall**_

_**But I fear**_

* * *

Pressure is Paramore's (From last chapter, Sorry) 

Fear is Sara Mclachlan's

Papa don't Preach is Madonna's

**Preview**

_"You know, you shouldn't be in my bed..."_

_"Tommy? What are we doing?"_

_"We probably should have the sex talk because I know sure as hell that mom won't talk to you about it-"_


	4. Chapter 2

I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 2 

_**Could it be that everything goes around by chance**_

_**Or only one way that it was always meant to be**_

_**You kill me**_

I woke to the sound of some one lightly knocking on my door.

"Come in." I mumbled and buried my self farther into the blankets.

I heard someone walk over to the side of the bed and then I felt the comforter being pulled up and the bed's weight shift. Someone was beside me. I immediately recognized his scent, my heart beat speeding up slightly.

"You're late."

"Huh?" I grumpled. I didn't get to sleep until really late… or early, which ever.

"Its 9:30. I waited 15 minutes before driving over here to get you out of bed."

"You know you shouldn't be in my bed, someone could catch us."

"Your mom let me in on her way out, she said Sadie had already left."

"I see." I flipped over and looked up at him. I avoided his eyes, the embarrassment of him seeing me totally naked now taking effect, along with everything else we did. His hair was perfect as usual and I was sure that I looked like a raccoon. The smirk on his face told me I was right. I climbed out of bed and walked into my bathroom and turned the shower on. I didn't know what to say to him. I was waiting for him to talk first. I washed my face while I waited for the water to heat up. I looked up into the mirror and jumped when I realized Tommy was standing behind me.

"Yes?"

"Need company?" Well that cleared everything up.

I quickly grabbed my toothbrush and brush my teeth as I noticed Tommy pulling off his shoes. I spat the toothpaste out and started pulling my own pajamas off. We made quick work of our clothes and I faced Tom, finally looking at him in all his glory. A smile spread across my face as he grabbed my hand and lead me to the shower.

Afterwards, we laid in my bed, staring up into the ceiling, a sheet covering us, my head resting on his chest. I was once again confused as to what was happening between us and I decided that I was going to be the brave one. Our hands were intertwined and I looked down at them and started to rub my thumb back and forth against his calloused hand.

"Tommy? What are we doing?" It came out barely a whisper but he still managed to hear me.

"I don't know." Well it wasn't the worst answer, I guess. He could have denied all contact.

"The last ten months since your birthday, has been really difficult for me. I realized that no matter what, I can't stop thinking about you and I don't really want to stop. So instead of fighting it, I will just go with it and see where it goes. If that's what you want?" Tommy had pulled my chin up to look at him and he was looking for answer.

"It's what I've always wanted." He smiled down at me and kissed me sweetly.

"We are gonna have to be really careful. I could get into serious trouble if anyone found out." This hurt more than I would ever admit. He wanted to keep me as his secret lover. But if that is what it would take to keep him, than I was more than willing. I kissed him back in understanding and got up from the bed to find some clothes so that we could actually get some work done.

We entered G-Major half an hour later with smiles on our faces.

"What are guys smiling about? And why the hell were you two, 2 and half hours late?" Darius demanded us.

"We had some great inspiration and got lost in the music. We got a good song too." Tom replied for me. Darius grumpled out something and we were on our way. We seemed to have a code name for sex now: Inspiration. I like it. We headed to studio C to record the song that I had written hastily on the way over. It was actually pretty good for the fifteen minute drive but I guess that's what inspiration does to you.

Tommy and I sat down on the couch, quickly going over the song one last time.

"Yah, that's great, repeat the _you kill me _few times before _you kill me with your touch_, it'll make it a little more symmetrical with the _I want you."_

"_You kill me, you kill me, you kill me with your touch…_" I sang back to him.

"Yep." His hand was resting on my knee while we worked and he gave it a quick squeeze and I glanced at him, his eyes soft with a slight smile tugging at his mouth. My own smile was forming. The moment was interrupted when Kwest walked in. Tom's hand quickly pulled away and I shot up and walked into the studio to set up. I grabbed my stool and put it under the mic. I tuned my guitar up and ran over the chords I would be doing. I looked up thorough the window, waiting for my cue. Tom's voice filled the room as he spoke.

"Take me on the floor, Jude Harrison, take one." His fingers counted down and my voice surrounded around me. Soon my fingers raked across the guitar strings.

_The lights are out and I barely know you  
We're going up and the place is slowing down  
I knew you'd come around_

_You captivate me, something about you has got me  
I was lonely now you make me feel alive  
Will you be mine tonight?_

_Take me on the floor (dadada da dadadada)  
I can't take it any more (dadada da dadadada)  
I want you, I want you, I want you to show me love  
Just take me on the floor (dadada da dadadada)  
I can give you more (dadada da dadadada)  
You kill me, you kill me, you kill me with your touch _

My heart is racing as you're moving closer  
You take me higher with every breath I take  
Would it be wrong to stay? 

Kwest's voice cut me off from the singing the rest.

"Hold up Jude, that sounds great but I think we should cut the acoustic. It's not working with this song so will just do the vocals for now and we'll figure out something else for the music."

I watched Tom through the glass, his eyes had not left me, and I was trying to fight the smile that was wanting to overtake my face. Images keep fluttering past my eyes of the way he looked at me last night, this morning, right now… like I was the only one he saw. I could feel my inner cheeks swell from my teeth digging in. I only managed a nod before turning my back on them and setting the Gibson down.

"Your gonna have to stop looking at her like that so we can get some actual work done." Kwest's voice caught me off guard. They had forgotten to turn the intercom off. I kept myself busy by slowly putting my guitar in its case, waiting for Tom's response.

"I'm not looking at her." Tom was a bad liar, it sounded like he was trying to convince himself.

"Whatever man, let's just get this track done. Just watch yourself, I don't want any shit from D."

I righted my self and took my position under the mic.

"Ok, from the top Jude. Jude Harrison, Take me on the floor, Vocals, take two."

A while later, I was walking past Tommy's office on my way back from seeing Portia, when I was grabbed and dragged into his office.

"Sorry, had to do that." My heart was pounding slightly from the adrenalin. His lips quickly pressed against mine before taking my hand and pulling me to his couch. He sat down and towing me down on top of him, my back to his chest. He buried his head into my hair and I could feel his hot breath on my neck. I wasn't quite sure what was happening and what all this was for but I let myself enjoy it, enjoy the simple touching that seeped to my core. I relaxed back, letting him have excess to my neck where softly pressed kisses below my lobe.

"We… have… to… be… really… careful…" He spoke each word after a kiss, the sentence taking forever to come out. "Kwest… is… suspicious… I'm… gonna… have… to… be…neutral… to… you…" My head nodded in response, not that I really understood what he was saying with his lips brushing the sensitive skin of my neck.

"Mmm, k…" I managed to twist around to kiss him fully on the lips, but my hand accidentally brushed against the center of his jeans and I felt him tense up. "I guess I shouldn't have touched that?"

He stood up and walked to his desk, sitting in his swivel chair. He was trying to get some distance between us. I understood the feeling. "Probably not the best idea at work."

"Alright, if you ignore me, I promise I won't get mad."

"Thanks, meet me in studio C in five minutes, I want a couple more takes for 'Take me on the floor.'"

On my way to studio C, Speid saw me from one of the other studios.

"Hey dude, how's the music flowing?" Damn, I had forgotten about Speid. He's in love with me. Now that I think about it, this could be good for me and Tommy's secret relationship. I put on my flirtiest smile and approached him.

"Its starting to. How's it going?"

"Pretty good know that you're here."

I gave my girliest giggle while trying to surpress an eye roll and wondering when he became such a cheese.

"So, I was wondering…uh, if you wanted to go out to dinner or something?"

"With you Harrison, anytime." I felt Tommy's eyes piercing my back but I would explain it later. I skipped off to Studio C after making plans for later with Speid.

"So… uh … a bout that date with spied….I figured it would take the attention off of us… you know… just in case… I am still sixteen." Tommy stops thrusting into me and looks at me for a second. I got a little scared,….but then he continued.

"Don't remind me of your age right now, or ever for that matter. But ya, that would be good." I smile down at and him and lean in for a kiss until he started speaking again.

"But you can't have sex with him." I giggled at the thought.

"I didn't plan to."

After we hit are highs, we quickly got up and put are clothes back on. I had exactly 20 minutes before Spied was picking me up from my house. I quickly ran my fingers through my sex hair and Tom looked back at me from the doorway, waiting for me.

"Don't worry, you look beautiful." I smiled at him and knowing that he was only saying that because he created the rats nest. Darius had let us go early today because he thought my new song was perfect and he sent us back out for more inspiration and we certainly took advantage of it. It was amazing how being with Tommy could create such magic. Everytime I looked into his eyes and realized that he was mine made my heart skip a beat and all I wanted to do capture it in the moment, forgetting that what we were doing was wrong.

I walked into the house with five minutes to spare. I really needed to fix my hair.

"You know, you have been spending a lot of time with Tommy outside of the studio." Damn. It was Sadie.

"Ya, trying to get some good inspiration for this album. I can't really talk right now though. Gotta date with Speid."

"Omg, you guys will be so cute together! Maybe Tom and I can go out on a double date with you two?" Pardon me?

"You and Tom are going out?"

"Well, not yet but I see the way he looks at me." Ok my sister is a freak and delusional. Maybe I can use this to my advantage as well. Shit 3 minutes and he will be here.

"Whatever, but I gotta go, don't wait up for me."

I got in really late that night, I was alone in my bed, thinking about my date with Speid. I actually had a fun time. He was really funny and rather sweet. He held my hand while we walked down the street and at the end of the night he gave me a really sweet kiss. It was nothing forced or unsure, just sweet and simple. I hate myself for doing this to him. He deserves better. Suddenly my door is thrown open and Sadie comes dashing in and jumps into my bed beside and looks at me.

"So how did it go?"

"I actually had a good time. He was really sweet." By this time, Sadie was giggling like a fool.

"That is so adorable. So… now that you have a real boyfriend, lets talk-"

"Hold up, I have had others like Jamie and Shay."

"They so don't count. First off Jamie is barely a boy and well Shay…. That lasted what like five days? Now back to what I was saying. We should probably have the sex talk because I know sure as hell that mom won't talk to you about it-"

"SADIE!" I interrupted her again. "I am not having this conversation with you."

"Yes we are. I know you think Speid is come great guy and all, but deep down he is a guy and at some point or another he is going to want to get laid." Wow what an uncomfortable conversation, for my end anyway. Good thing she doesn't know about me and Tommy.

"Sadie. Hold up. I have decided that I will remain a virgin until I get married, that's if I get married. So no need to talk to me about all this. How bout we delay it for another say 15 years. Yah, that sounds good."

"Jude. You are so juvenile. One day, your hormones are gonna hit a high and you are gonna wanna get laid, even if it is by Speid." Little bit of vomit just came up my throat. I soon realized that it would be easier to shut up and listen to her then fight. Maybe I could get some tips out of this.

"There are three main rules. Number one, ALWAYS, and I mean ALWAYS use protection, no matter how many times he tells you he is virgin, he's lying. Guys will put it anywhere." Ok, I think I really did just vomit, images were flashing past my brain that I never wanted to see. Think about kittens and puppies, or just Tommy, that'll work. The smile soon reappeared on my face.

"Second, if you have to, fake it. The louder you scream the more of a chance that they'll actually make you cum." I was pretty sure that I would never need to fake it with Tommy due to the fact that I could come just by looking at him but it's always good to know.

"And lastly, the first time may be brutal but it will get better. I promise! And Jude don't be ashamed of your body, you're beautiful." Typical Sadie, always has to end it on a good note.

_**You always know the perfect thing to say**_

_**I know what I should do but I just can't walk away**_

* * *

Sorry for the delay. I blame midterms, Cobra Starship (they came to town and were amazing and I was vibrating for days afterwards) and the fact that i hate this chapter. 

So because I hate this chapter, I'm proposing a double post, but only if I get reviews.

O Ya! I made a mistake. I forgot that I had changed my mind about Jude dating Jamie, so she actual did briefly, the same as in Instant star.

Kill is Jimmy Eat World's

Take me on the floor is The Veronicas'

**_Preview_**

_"Me and the lattice got in a fight and he won."_

_"No bra today Harrison?"_

_"This isn't working._

_"Jude? What are you doing up? It's two am."_


	5. Chapter 3

I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 3 

_**We looked like giants in the back of my grey subcompact  
Fumbling to make contact  
As the others slept inside  
**_

The next morning I skipped into studio C with my notebook and saw Tommy and Kwest mixing my song from yesterday.

"Good Morning!" I said cheerfully.

"Well someone had a good night last night!" Kwest replied back to me but Tommy just stared at me.

"How was your date with Speid?" Kwest further inquired.

"It was really good actually, I had a lot of fun."

"I hope not too much fun." Well Tom is in a great mood. I chose to ignore him but I couldn't help the eye roll.

"Guess what I found out?!"

"What?" They both replied, my exuberance not affecting them at all.

"I heard that my sister has a huge crush on Tom Tom here and I think he should ask her out. What do you think Kwest?" Tom stared at me incredulously. Kwest had a big smile on his face.

"Ya that's a great idea, Jude. Tommy hasn't gone on a date in forever, like since he started producing you." Oh Really?

"Is that so Tommy? Why? Not found anyone your type?" Ok, I know I was pushing his buttons but I love seeing him squirm.

"You keep me really busy so I don't really have time." Tom's fingers were fidgeting on the sound board, playing with the knobs. It was just another habit of his that annoyed me. My hand uncontrollably covered his to stop the movement.

"Well if that's your story."

"I'm gonna go grab a coffee. Want anything you two?" Me and Tommy shook our heads as Kwest left the room.

"Jude, are you sure about this? Getting other people involved? It's one thing to use Speid, but Sadie? She's your sister. I don't want any of this to blow up in our faces." His hand had slipped out from mine and intertwined our fingers.

"I thought about that but Sadie is Sadie. She's in love with your face, not you. Once she gets annoyed with you she'll dump you. So this Sommy thing will maybe last a month, tops."

Tom's face feigned hurt for a split second before he yanked his hand back along with mine, pulling me into his lap.

"Annoying, huh?" I could see the smirk building at the corners of his mouth. "Well, if I'm annoying, you're stupid."

"Good one Quince, how old are you? Five? But seriously, I doubt me and Speid will last either, so after we fool everyone, I'll be all yours."

Tom placed his lips sweetly on mine before talking. "So you're mine to keep?" He was looking up at me with his cool blue eyes and there was no way I would tell him differently.

"Forever." I stole another kiss until the sound of someone entering the room stopped us and before I knew it, my butt was making contact with the ground. Tommy had jumped up with surprise when Kwest entered.

"Jude are you all right?" Tommy asked as he gave me a hand up.

"Yah just a sore butt." Kwest was looking at us suspiciously.

"How did Jude end up on the floor?"

"Funny thing really," Tom began, "we were messing around and I pulled the chair out from underneath her and she fell. Uh, is Sadie out there? I think I will go ask about that date now." With that, Tom rushed out of the room. I grabbed my note book and proceeded to scribble some lyrics down.

"_Cause I'm_ _Yours to keep if you want to…_" I softly sang.

"Whats with all the inspiration Harrison? Lyrics seem to be really flowing. Last week, you were dry as a desert."  
"You know, it's just a good time in my life right now. Great boyfriend, my grades are half decent, parents are trying to work their problems out, you know, everything is starting to not look so dark."

"D will be pleased, although some of your best work came when you were struggling with stuff. But now your life's great and you're able to produce some more great hits. Sure that's all that's going on? Have you been getting down and dirty with Spied?"

"What? NO NO NO! I can't explain where the lyrics are coming from but they are not coming because I'm 'getting down and dirty'." Of course Tom has to walk back in at this point to the end of the conversation.

"Who's getting down and dirty?" He was looking back and forth between Kwest face and mine.

"Apparently not Jude. What about you Tom?"

"Well, since you're asking... Fucked a girl three times in one day a couple days ago. It was great. Best ever." My jaw was on the floor. I'm sure that a blush was appearing on my face. His head was cocked to the side with his infamous smirk on.

"Tommy!"

"What! Kwest asked."

"Fine, I'm leaving if you going to talk about that…that stuff. I'll be in the booth if you need me." I left quickly before I heard anymore of my abilities. A slow smile spread across my face when I realized he had said 'best ever'.

Half an hour later, Tommy entered the booth.

"Done with that song yet?"

"Almost. Do you wanna look at it?" I passed it over to him without waiting for an answer. He quickly read it over and formulated a beat in his own head.

"Jude, this is really different, I like it. I will credit myself for the inspiration." He wore that stupid cocky grin on his face again and the urge to smack was more prominent then ever but I knew he was right.

"Seems it's always you Quincy."

"Do you wanna sing this a couple times and see how it goes and figure out what we can do with it and then call it a day. Maybe get 'down and dirty' later?"

"Sex isn't happening. I can barely sit on my butt let alone do anything else on it since you dropped me."

"Who said anything about you being on it?" My hands clenched in annoyance. Stupid Quincy smirk. Breathe Jude. In and Out.

"I probably shouldn't, parents are already starting to question my late night recording session from the other night. They are constantly fighting and I don't want one more thing to add to the 'take it out on Jude' list. But if we get far in this song today, we will have extra time tomorrow and Speidermen has class tomorrow so I am free."

"Fine if that's what it takes. Oh shit. I can't tomorrow. I have a date with your sister. Damn. How bout when I drop her off I will pick you up for a quickie?"

"Well see how you behave tomorrow, alright?"

"Yes Ms.Harrison." With that he saluted me and left the booth to sit in front of the sound board.

The next night I was climbing out of my window and shimming down the lattice that was covered in vines. I landed in a heap on the ground between a rose bush and a shrub/bush thingy when the lattice gave out. I was covered in dirt and leaves. I hide around the corner of the house watching Tommy walk Sadie to the door. I giggled as Sadie went in to kiss him and Tommy quickly turned his head so that she missed and ended up pecking him on the cheek. He muttered a 'goodnight' and a 'we should do this again' before heading back to his hummer. Once the coast was clear I made a wild dash down the street to the bus stop and hopped into the H2.

"What the hell happened Harrison? You're covered in leaves and what is that?" He was staring at a slimy mush stuck to my knee.

"Me and the lattice got in a fight and he won. Leaves and the slug broke the fall, though." I scrapped the slug off of my jeans as best as I could and flung it out the window. It got stuck to the side of the hummer as Tommy drove on. I quickly rolled up the window hoping Tommy wouldn't notice his newly decorated truck.

"Whre are we going?"

"Down to the pier. Its usually quiet at this time of night."

"You know this from experience?"

"Something like that." I huffed out a sign as I realized he has had many partners and I probably was just another one to add to the list. I looked out the window as the houses became warehouses, not really paying attention.

"You ok Jude?"

"Ya I'm fine." Of course I'm not you idiot.

"You sure?"

"Yes!" I snapped back at him. He deserved it though.

He pulled into the pier and turned the car off. He sat staring into the water, as I continued to look at my reflection in the window.

"You are the only one who knows about this place. It's our place. Don't ever think that you are just another girl." I looked over at him and realized he was being completely sincere.

Tommy leaned over the console, his right hand gripped the back of my neck, pulling my face to him. We were centimeters apart, his breath hot on my face. His eyes quickly searched mine. His nose rubbed against mine then he captured my lips in a bruising kiss. His tongue slide along my lower lip begging for entrance and who was I to deny him. I slide not so elegantly to the driver's side, my knees straddling his legs. I pulled at his shirt freeing it from nice dress pants that he had wore on special occasion for his date. My fingers grazed the warm skin underneath feeling and touching his well toned abs. Tommy's own hands worked at my own shirt, exposing my breasts.

"No bra today Harrison?"

"I figured it would cut into our time together." I murmured out.

He worked his hands into my breasts, kneading them and stroking my nipples with his thumbs, causing me to quiver. His mouth never left mine as he worked his hands down to my pants, quickly unbuttoning them. He soon realized I was without panties.

Muffled sounds came from Tommy's mouth as he eagerly hauled me up onto my knees with my hands braced onto his shoulders while he shimmied my pants down. His hands glided up the back of my legs before settling with his fingers between my thighs. He pushed two fingers into me while a gasp left my mouth and I rested my forehead against his and squeezed my eyes shut as I quickly became comfortable with the sensation. His fingers thrusted into me and I tried to undo his pants but his motions prevented my hands to function. His actions were becoming more familiar, until he started pressing against my clit, causing the heat to rise to my face. I could feel my hair starting to stick to my forehead. Moans were dribbling out of my mouth without my constant. I was losing it. Before long, my juices were pouring into his hand. After a few minutes of resting my head into his shoulder, I pulled my jeans completely off and hopped over the seat. Wordlessly, Tommy followed me. He joined me in the back and I finally managed to get his pants and boxers off. He hovered over top of me and quickly pulled on the condom. He spread my legs open and kissed me with burning desire as he entered me. I silently nodded my ok, as he proceeded to have his way with me. With every thrust, my tailbone made contact with the floor causing me to wince in pain. My back was getting a major rug burn from the carpeting. I put my two hands on Tom's chest and pushed him off of me as I tried to stop the pain.

"This isn't working." I stated as I pushed him onto his own back while we were still connected. Tommy looked at me confused until he ran his hands down my back and noticed the fresh raw skin from the rug burn.

"Jude, I am so sorry. I've never done it in the back of this truck."

"That's good to know I'm the first." It really did thrill me that I was to the first to experience this with him. I knew that he probably already had every sexual experience possible so to make a new experience with him somehow made me feel special.

I rested my hands on his chest as I worked myself on him, his hands tight around my hips. We met each other thrust for thrust, our screams echoing off the windows of the large H2. Music played softly in the background, contradicting the mood. I came rather quickly like usual, half due to my inexperience, the other half from the Sex God that was Tom Quincy. We laid entangled together until we caught our breaths.

"Hmmm, I think I preferred the bed," I stated, "but this was kinda exciting and dangerous."

"I agree. Maybe 'danger' should be our middle names." I laughed at the thought and quickly found my clothes and pulled them on as Tommy did the same. The ride back was completely silence from the lack of energy and the feeling of fulfillment.

Tommy parked the H2 down the street and we stared at my quiet house. I didn't feel like leaving just yet so we just sat there. A thought dawned on me.

"I don't know how I'm gonna get back inside."

"What do you mean? Go back in the same way you came out." He said it like it was some easy feat.

"Up my broken lattice?"

"Well how bout I give you a boost?"

"You serious?" There was no way he was going to push me up that far.

"Dead."

"Alright then." He drove the hummer closer to the house and we popped out and made are way to my side of the house and stared up at it. I could see the hope slipping from his face.

"Maybe there's a 24 hour home depot around. We could buy me a ladder like in Dawson's Creek. We would never have to do this again." My suggestion made me giddy, I always wanted to be Joey.

"That sounds like a plan but I don't think 24 hour home depots exist." Damn, that really sucks. We continued to stare up at for what seemed like an eternity.

"Maybe I will just try to go through the front door and pray that no one hears me."

"Fine, but tomorrow we are buying a ladder. See ya tomorrow. Nine am. Got it?"

"Uh, yep 9 am." I said this casually hoping that I could feign forgetfulness tomorrow. I made my way to the front door and watched Tommy drive away. I opened the door which caused a creaking noise. I quickly removed my shoes for silent walking and smoothly shut the door. I walked up the stairs. Stupid old house I cursed. I made it to the last step when I heard my parent's door open and there stood my mother.

"Jude, what are you doing up? Its 2 am." I was frozen in shock.

The most ridiculous excuse came to my head and I ran with it.

"Didn't you hear the cats? They were rattling the garbage. I couldn't sleep at all, so I went to chase them away." Take that fucking cats.

"Cats? No I didn't hear anything. I must have been dead asleep. But why aren't you in your pajamas?" Oh damn.

"I didn't want anyone to see me in my pajamas so I quickly changed."

"Alright then, have a better sleep. I am just going to go grab some water." I hurried to my room where I could finally let out my breath. I collapsed on my bed and succumbed to sleep.

_**And together there  
In a shroud of frost, the mountain air  
Began to pass from every pane of weathered glass  
And I held you closer than anyone would ever get**_

* * *

Thanks so much for the reviews! They are always appreciated and they make me want to post more! 

We looked like Giants is Death Cab for Cutie's

Yours to keep is the TeddyBears' and Paola's

I also can't promise an update next sat because I have my last midterm on friday! YAY!...Not.

_**Preview**_

_"Bring them both here tomorrow for dinner."_

"Sadie, I forbid you to date him!" 


	6. Chapter 4

I own nothing.

* * *

Chapter 4 

_**Keep your body moving, girl  
The beat is bumpin'  
Go ahead and let them talk  
Their words mean nothing**_

I stumbled down the stairs, making my way to the kitchen. I stopped when I heard heightened voices. It was Dad and Sadie. I stood off to the side of the swinging kitchen door. There was no need to press my ear up to the door the way I usually did when I wanted to snoop. Their booming voices were only getting louder, impossible to ignore.

"Sadie, I forbid you to date him!" My father's voice scared me. He only spoke to my mother like that when they were arguing, never towards Sadie or me.

"Dad, he's not like that anymore! You can't listen to all that crap they write in the tabloids! It's a buncha crap!" My sister never fought back towards my father. This was interesting.

"Sadie, Tom is a just a guy looking for an easy girl. He's constantly in the paper with different girls. He's life is displayed for the whole world to see. You don't want a life like that." My father voice had softened a bit, trying to get Sadie to understand.

"Jude's always in the paper as well. You don't seem to mind about it." It was true, Dad never said a word about my life in the tabloids.

"Jude's not like that Sadie. She doesn't try to be in the paper, she just happens to have won a talent constant and she makes a good story. And I know that all the stuff they put in there about her is fabricated." My father, the hypocrite. There voices had quieted down a bit and I unconsciously moved closer to the door, my fingers gently resting on it.

"Dad! Don't you see! It's the same thing with Tom! He doesn't try either! He's a good guy! Just give him a chance! Pleaaasssse!" I could hear the pleading in her voice and I knew my father, he would compromise.

"Sadie, bring him to dinner and I'll think about it. Ok?" His voice was getting closer and I quickly turned around and flew to the couch, landing on my side while searching for the clicker. My father walked into thru the door as the tv turned on. I glanced over to them and Sadie had followed dad out.

"Fine. But Jude has to bring Speid." Oh Shit.

"Why Speid?" I sunk further into the couch trying to become invisible. I hadn't told the parents I was dating him for many reasons. One being my father was overprotective. Two being my father was old fashioned and thought men should ask the father for permission to date his daughter. Third being that I didn't really feel like I was dating Speid, it was more like just hanging out with occasional kissing and movie stops. Fourth being Speid would wet his pants if he had to deal with my father.

"Duh, dad, she's dating him."

"JUDITH!" Damn he found me. I popped my head back up.

"Yes?" I said in a way too innocent voice with a big smile plastered on my face for effect.

"Since when have you and Speid been 'you and speid'.

"Aw, you know, since like a couple weeks ago." I stated it casually as I put my focus back on the tv, pretending what I was watching was the most interesting thing on the planet.

He grunted in response.

"Fine, bring'em both here tomorrow for dinner." Great. This will be a fun experience.

The next morning I was on my stomach in the sound booth, the eraser end of my pencil between my lips. Tommy was standing above me, his right shoe was discarded beside me and his socked foot was rubbing circles along my back. His toes were pressing into my back with the right amount pressure causing moans and gurgles to leak out. My focus was diminishing fast. My eyes were slowly closing and my head was getting closer to the floor. Lyrcis were the last thing on my mind.

"Sadie said something about dinner at your house tonight." I let the pencil drop from my lips.

"Mmm, Dad wants to get to know you better before he lets his daughter date you."

"Shit your dads going to be there? Sadie failed to mention that."

"She knew you wouldn't show if she did." My head was smushed into the carpeting, as Tommy worked his toes into my neck. "Speid and my mother will be coming as well so don't worry about it. It may actually turn out to be an amusing night."

"For you maybe." His foot slide down my back and stopped on my butt before sliding down further and pressing up between my legs. I subconscious moved into his foot but it had been removed. Tommy joined me on the floor and grabbed my notebook from underneath my head.

"_You make me wanna lala…_ me too Harrison me too." My eyes drifted back open and I tilted my head up to see his face.

"It's all I've got."

"I'm sure we'll figure something out. What time tonight?"

"Uh, I think I told Speid six." I looked up at the clock. "Shit I got to go. I have a double tutor session." I sat up and grabbed my stuff and headed to the door. "Don't be late!"

I was sitting on my bed, trying to finish my song that I had started earlier- to be honest, I was still on the second line. My mind still wasn't all there. The more I thought about the dinner the more nervous I became. It was like bringing two boyfriends to dinner. It was bad enough with one boyfriend let alone with two especially with my father. I knew how it would go. It would start out pleasant, you know, small talk and such and then dinner would be served and that is when all the real drama would start. 20 questions was my father's favorite game. I had witnessed some disastrous questioning with some of Sadie's boyfriends and it almost made all of them weep. My father already hated Tommy so I knew it had the potential of being a scary night. My father had yet to say anything rude about Speid. It was entirely possible that he could like him. But it really didn't matter. He was only my decoy boyfriend.

"_In the kitchen, on the floor…"_ My eyes kept darting to the street and back to my notebook looking for Tommy's headlights. I needed to prepare him a little more.

"_I'll be a French maid…"_ I heard the low roar of the viper and I flew up, racing down the stairs and out the door before anyone could see me. Tommy was just getting out of his car.

"Hey." I waited as he closed the door and turned to me, leaning back against it.

"Hey girl. Ready for this?"

I skipped the question and went straight for the good stuff. "Ok, keep you're answer short and simple. Don't talk about ex's or sex. The less you say the better." Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Speid walking up to us.

"Hey Speid." I grabbed onto his hand thinking it would be the proper thing to do but I also saw Tommy's jaw clench.

"Dude, Do you think he'll kill me?" Speid looked nervous. Poor guy.

"I think Tommy has a better chance of dying than you do." I was being completely honest. Speid shoulders seemed to drop slightly in relief.

"Thanks Jude." Sarcasm practically dripped from Tommy's mouth. I looked over at him and shrugged. There was nothing I could do to save him. The three of us made our way to the front. We paused in front of it and I mumbled out a quick prayer and a good luck, may the best man win before pushing open the door.

When the door opened, Sadie came bounding down the stairs. She welcomed Tom and clung onto his arm. His fake smile was only evident to me. My father soon entered the foyer, my mother following close behind.

"Tom." My father stated towards Tom. Tommy reached his hand out but my father's attention was on Speidermen.

"Vincent. Good to see you!" My father's whole face lit up at the sight of Speid. "How's it going?"

"Uh, Good sir. Thank you for having me." There was a slight quiver in his voice. My grip on Speid's hand tightened, trying to induce some confidence in him.

"Tom, it's nice to see you here in the pm. We usually only see you in the morning dragging Jude out of bed." My mother's words subconsciously made my face blush. Tom hadn't had to drag me out of bed for a while now. Banging Jude in bed was more appropriate. Speid's voice brought me out of my reminiscence.

"Dude?"

"Pardon?"

"What are you thinking about? Your eyes went all glazed."

"Uh, a new lyric just came to my head." I realized that everyone had migrated to the dining room. I pulled Speid along with me.

Tom sat across from me with Sadie on his right, my father on his left at the head of the table. My father poured himself a glass of wine before handing it over to Tommy. I watched him intently praying he was going to pass it along to my mother and not fill up his own glass. He did and a small sign escaped my lips.

"Something the matter Jude?" I looked at my father and shook my head.

"No not at all. Um I'm gonna grab some water." I dashed through the joining door to kitchen before heading back in. My father started his game.

"So Speid, how is school going? Or have you had to get a tutor like Jude?" All eyes were on me, accusing me of my stupidness. It's really not my fault.

"No actually, I'm still at Carson. But school is going really good. My hard work has paid off. I may graduate a semester early." My father beamed at his answer.

"Jude, it looks like you finally found a smart one!" I shot a glare at my family and boyfriends as they all chuckled.

"Tom, where did you grow up, pre-Boyz Attack!?" My father inquired.

"I grew up in Montreal until I joined."

"Oh really! I did as well!" My father seemed to be content and almost happy with Toms answer. "What high school did you go to? I went to John Rennie!" My food caught in my throat and I was choking. I knew Tom never made it past 7th grade and I knew it would not sit well with my father. The piece of food had dislodged but I made more of a commotion then it was, trying to get my father to forget the questioning. My mother filled my glass up and Speid was whacking me on the back as I made a display of trying to breath. When I could no longer fake it, I changed the subject.

"Dad, this spaghetti is delicious! Did you add something different to it?"

"It's no different then it usually is."

"Hmm, well it tastes great!" My attempts to change the subject seemed to be failing.

"So Tom, what school did you go to?" I looked up from my plate and watched Tommy answer.

"Uh, I went to Saint George's until Darius discovered me. He found me a tutor who traveled with us but I never completed high school." The room became silent as we all anticipated my fathers reaction. The frown was evident on his face but he soon regained composure.

"I see. I was wondering where Jude got the brilliant idea to stop going to school." I could feel my face start to heat up. I was not embarrassed by my own actions but of my fathers, blaming Tom for my own decisions.

"Dad, Tom had nothing to do with me dropping out of school. You know I was too busy with the studio and music is my life. I was not about to put school in front of it!" My voice had risen slightly but I couldn't help it. The table was silent. But of course, my mother and her fear of awkwardness to the rescue.

"Anyone for desert?" Eager yes's were heard around the table. My mother rose from the table and gave my father a pointed look, silently telling him to help her. The four of us were left alone, all of us unsure of what to say. Sadie spoke up first.

"Tom? Are we going to do anything after this?" His eyes flicked past mine before they landed back on Sadie.

"Unfortunately I can't tonight, I had a really late night last night at the studio and I'm having an early morning tomorrow again. How bout tomorrow?"

"Sure! There's that new movie out…uh with what's his name… Hayden… Hayden Christensen! Yah that's it! I can't remember what it's called…damn…"

"Jumper?" I volunteered. Me and Tommy had already seen it. It was pretty good. Well for me anyway. Yummy Hayden. But of course no one compares to Tommy.

"Oh ya sure. That sounds great!" Tommy acted like the perfect boyfriend. I was impressed. My parents brought in the cheese cake but something was wrong. I could feel the tension between my parents. I choose to ignore it for the moment. I looked over at Speid. He had been quiet as a mouse this whole evening. He too was the perfect gentlemen. I was almost proud of him.

"So Tommy, what are your intentions with Sadie? Are they platonic or physical?" I was not the only one who chocked on my food this time. Everyone was trying to swallow their food and were looking between my father and Tom. Tommy's face showed only shock. His mouth was still dropped open. My mother's voice finally came to her.

"Stuart! We discussed this. Let them be!"

"Vicky, I will not let this man use my daughter! She is better then him! And he is 5 years older!"

Speid was staring at his plate, Sadie was still recovering and Tom was trying to catch flies. I offered an escape to this awful evening.

"So guys, I'll walk you to the door?"

Speid and Tommy both lept up and muttered thanks for dinner to my mother before leaving the table. Me and Sadie followed them out to the front. I shut the two front doors behind us but the yelling was still well heard. Speid and I made plans for the following evening as did Tommy and Sadie. Tom left quickly and Sadie entered back into the lions den. I watched as Tom peeled out of the drive way and park behind the tree in front of the bus stop. I pecked Speid on the cheek and waved him off as he walked down the street in the opposite direction. As soon as he was out of site, I sprinted to the hidden blue viper and got in.

"Tommy, I am so so sorry. My father is just protective. He'll get over it tomorrow I promise.'

"Your dad hates me Jude." I could hear the wound in his voice.

"I know." My voice came out as a whisper. I looked out at the street. There was nothing I could do or say. I couldn't lie because it was obvious that my dad hated him. We sat in silence for a few minutes. Both of us unsure of what to say.

"Well that was enough excitement for one week." His words brought a small smirk to my lips.

"I bet it could get even more exciting." My voice hinted to something definitely not platonic. A goofy grin appeared on his face as he looked at the clock.

"How long do we have?"

"Doesn't matter, they'll think I'm with Speid."

"I still can't believe your father likes Speid over Me!" I laughed.

"Me too, but my dad has known Speid since he was like 7 so it's easier for him." He nodded his head in understanding and pulled out of the street, following the familiar route to where our story began.

_**Tonight we'll touch  
And they won't know  
I know you're dying  
To take off your clothes**_

* * *

I'm impressed that I actually finished but I made myself an ultimatum. This or homework. Obviously homework lost. 

I can't believe this is only the fourth chapter but the story will start to pick up a bit cause the good stuff should be coming... I hope!

I haven't seen Jumper so I actually don't know if it's good or not. It may be worth watching just for Hayden!

Wish we were older is Metro Station's.

Lala is Ashley Simpson's.

**_Preview_**

_"Happy Birthday Girl."_

_"I hate you."_

_"God, you shouldn't have worn this."_

_"I missed you."_

_"You jerk, what took you so long?"_

_"Fuck you."_


	7. Chapter 5

I own nothing.

* * *

_**So hear this please  
And watch as your hearts speeds up endlessly  
And look for the stars as the sun goes down  
Each breath that you take has a thunderous sound  
Everything, everything's magic**_

Me and Tommy had been seeing each other for a few months. I had dug around in the garage and found a ladder hidden in the corner. It was old and wobbly but it was better than a broken lattice. I hauled it out and leaned it up beside my window. It was a bit precarious and first few times going down it I had to close my eyes. By the sixth time, I was an old pro flying down it like I was an acrobat. I also learned to leave the window slightly open to prevent being locked out. Soon December came, along with bad weather. The many feet of snow made driving dangerous and me unmotivated to leave the warmth of my bed. Sex seemed to only happen on mornings when my family was at work. It had also become less frequent with Darius breathing down are necks for new songs leaving us exhausted by the end of the day.

Me and Speid were hanging out at 620 when he pulled me in for a kiss and then down onto the couch. It was getting pretty heated and all I could think of was Tommy and how I was cheating on him. I had been going steady with Speid and he thought it was getting serious. He was becoming more and more touchy-feely and it was getting hard to make up excuses as to why we should stop. At first it was easy. I used good excuses like 'I'm not ready', 'We just started going out', 'I have my period', 'I don't feel well', 'I have to be home in ten minutes', 'I think I'm getting sick, cough cough'. But I knew that I eventually would run out of excuses. His lips worked fast down my neck to my collarbone. Speid started in on the buttons of my shirt and he had three undone before I realized what was happening and I quickly pushed Speid off of me.

"Speid, wait!"

"Dude, what's wrong?"

"I just…I just…I don't know… I …" Nothing was coming to me. No excuses. No reasons. Nothing. I thought back to when Sadie went on about sex and Speid. It then came to me.

"I've been thinking, uh that I want to wait."

"Dude what are you talking about?" Typical Speid, so clueless.

"Sex. I want to wait until I'm married." There I did it. Now I never had to come up with an excuse again.

"Oh." Speid looked a little shocked.

"Are you ok with this?"

"Well I guess, I don't really have a choice do I."

"Sorry. But we can still make out, if you want." That was all I was willing to do with him but that was a hell of a lot more than what Tom wanted me to do.

XXX

It was my seventieth birthday and all I wanted was to be with Tommy. The perfect birthday I had envisioned was me, a nude Tommy, and warm duvet. But that wasn't going to happen. G Major was holding a big bash for me and I didn't want it. I was dolled up in a short black satin chiffon baby doll dress. It was very short, just barely covering my butt cheeks and coming low between my breasts. It wasn't something I normally would have worn out in public, but Portia convinced me I looked hot and Speid would be drooling like a dog. I didn't really want him to drool but I hoped it would have the same effect on Tommy. My blond hair had been perfectly curled and it was loosely clipped up, the rest descended down my back. I hadn't seen Tommy all day and I wanted Tommy to be the first one to see my dress. I peeked down the hall, saw that no one was around and clicked down the hall in my black pumps. I opened his office door softly, trying to not make much noise. Tommy was sitting at his desk, typing furiously. I waited, knowing that he would look over when he was done. He twirled his chair around and stopped, his eyes working their way from my pumps to my face. He eyes bugged out and lingered back on my thighs. He stood and slowly strode over to me still taking in my appearance.

"Wow, Jude… you look…wow. I don't know if I want anyone to see you in this, it looks like lingerie. God. Your beautiful." His voice was husky and I wanted him. Badly. I felt my heart do a little dance before steadying to loud thumps. His fingers played lightly along my thighs, just underneath the dress, his eyes darting to the door to make sure it was locked. "God, you shouldn't have worn this." My head shot up and I looked at him confused. "Oh, no no, I meant that I don't know if I can go the whole night without touching you." I felt my eyes light back up and I needed him more then ever.

"You don't have too." My voice was quiet hoping he wouldn't reject me. Our eyes met and he grabbed my face with his hands, kissing me like it would be the last time. Pulling away briefly, he cupped my bare butt cheeks, heaving me up , my legs instinctively wrapping around is waist. I felt the cool wood of his desk underneath me and I reached down between us, undoing his zipper, slipping my hand in.

"Watch my hair." I gasped out. His fingers ran farther up my thighs, and then back down with my thong, his fingers giving me goosebumps. I reached behind him, grapping the condom out of his back pocket and sheathing him. He entered me without hesitance. My breathing became heavy rapidly, my fingers griping deeply into his back. The desk was shaking underneath me, but I barely noticed. He was groaning into my ear and I bit into his shoulder, fighting the orgasm. It wasn't working and I came screaming, his hand quickly covering my mouth. His own orgasm followed quickly. We rested against each other, catching our breaths. "Thanks. I needed that." I muttered into his shoulder.

"Yah, me too." He pulled out and I pulled my panties back up as he cleaned up. There was a knock on the door and desperately tried not to panic. I quickly straightened out my dress and fluffed up my hair. Tom picked up the items that had fallen off the desk and kissed me quick before pulling open the door.

"Hey Kwest,." he said casually.

"Hey, Portia is looking for Jude. Something about makeup."

"Oh, thanks, see ya guys later." I grabbed my clutch and left.

Later that night, I had danced with almost everyone except for the one I wanted to the most. Speid was all over me the entire night. Portia was right about this drooling. While I danced with Speid, I watched as Sadie and Tommy danced; him twirling her around, her giggling. I watched with green eyes. We had spun around so I couldn't see them anymore, which only worsened my mood. I rested my head into Speid's too small chest. The song ended and a new one began. At the first note, my head popped up, instantly recognizing it. It was our song. Dean Martin's voice flowed through the speakers, and someone else's voice joined it.

"May I cut in?" I looked at Speid for his permission and he handed me off.

"I missed you." I breathed into his chest.

"Missed you more." He brought our hands up so that they were resting on his chest. His mouth was just above my ear. He softly sang along with the song, and my heart felt like it had melted. "_Just remember darling, all the while, You belong to me."_

"God," I whispered, "when can we get out of here?"

"Anytime you want."

"After this song." We didn't move are feet, just swayed back and forth. The song ended and I rushed to my parents, telling them I was spending the nights at Kat's. They agreed, too wrapped up in there own problems to realize Kat had moved away a few weeks previous. My parents left and I said Good bye to everyone and went outside to drive to Tom's house. He was driving Sadie home. I entered his apartment with the key he had given me. I pulled out candles from my bag, setting them up around his bed. I pulled off my dress and put on my new teddy lingerie. I laid there on his bed waiting… waiting… waiting. At some point I had fallen asleep. When the lights flicked on, I jumped up and blinked rapidly. I looked up seeing Tommy leaning against the door, an amused look on his face.

"You jerk, what took you so long?" I demanded, I was pissed, it was my birthday and I had high hopes for the evening.

"Your crazy sister can't shut up."

"You could have just kicked her to the curb, you know. I wouldn't have minded." He just shook his head and his smile spread to his eyes.

"You look great." I glared at him. I wasn't in the mood anymore. I crawled in his bed, pulling the covers over me. "Come on Juddde."

"Fuck you." I muttered.

"I have your present…" My head popped up and I looked at him.

"Is it good?"

"You tell me." I sat up, pulling the covers up over my chest so that he couldn't get a glimpse of anything. He was still in the dog house. He walked over to me and sat down on the bed. He put the small rectangular box on my lap. I opened it and stared. It was a beautiful platinum bracelet with a plate. One side of the plate was engraved with my name. On the other side, 'You belong to me'. I looked up at him, tears glistening my eyes.

"I love it, thank you." I quickly brushed my lips against his, letting him put the bracelet on. When he was done, I flipped over, settling back into my cocoon.

"Juddde…" He was rubbing my back.

"Go to bed, Tommy."

"Please girl." He was undoing the zipper on the back of my lacy one piece and I moved away, knowing I would give in if he continued. He fingers kept wandering, moving down. He squeezed me between my thighs and my breath hitched. He knew he had won. I flipped over pulling the duvet up, letting him in.

"I hate you." I muttered

"I know." He pulled his shirt off along with his pants. He slipped in, his hands running up my lace covered sides. He thumbed my nipples, causing them to become erect. His lips kissed me over my chest and worked there way down. He slid down farther, spreading my legs apart, his head between them.

"I love this crotchless thing." He told my center. I felt his breath on me and shivered. His tongue swirled around me before entering me. I squirmed from the pleasure, but his hands gripped my hips too tightly. My knuckles were white from gripping the bed sheets a little too firmly. I came fast and hard in his mouth. It was like nothing I had felt before. He came back up to my face kissing me, and I could taste myself on his lips.

"Happy Birthday Girl." His lips brushed against mine as he said this. I panted in response and moved out from under him. I turned over, pretending to go to sleep. "So you're going to bed now, nothing for me?"

"Nope. Sleep tight." I tried fighting a giggle, but it came loose and he noticed. He grabbed my sides tickling me and my laughter bubbled up uncontrollably. "Oh god Tommy, it's so hard to fight you. Please fuck me now."

"Fuck you? What! No we are _making love_!" He said in a sing song voice. I kept laughing at his cheesiness, letting him have his way with me.

X X X

The next day, me and Tom had the day off. We walked down to the strip, grabbing a coffee, and window shopped. Laughing at all the ridiculous things that were displayed. Tom pulled me to a stop and I looked at the darkened window.

"What is this place?" I questioned.

"You'll see." The smirk on his face scared me but he grabbed my hand, dragging me inside.

The room was darkly lit with large pictures among pictures of small figures and letters all over the walls. I quickly realized where we were.

"No. No. No. It's not going to happen." I tried pulling my hand free but he had a good grip but I turned around and tried to make a run for the door. His other hand reached out and grabbed my waist pulling me back.

"Please girl, for me." He pulled out his weapon, the stupid puppy eyes that no one could resist. Damn him.

"Fine, but you have to get one too."

"Of course, they'll match!" The huge grin on his face made all my doubts vanish and I knew then that I was screwed. I would never be able to say no to him.

I looked around at the different designs, trying to find something, beautiful yet us. I came up dry.

"I don't see anything I really like, how bout you?" I glanced over at him expectantly.

"Yep, I know exactly what you should get."

"Of course you to do. What is it?"

"My name so that everyone knows that you belong to me." My eyes felt like they were popping out of their sockets.

"You're serious. Your name? Where?" I asked incredulously.

"Well it has to be somewhere that not many people can see… your left butt cheek. I wouldn't want to cover up that awfully cute freckle on your right one."

"No Way! I'm not letting HIM touch my butt." I glanced over to the bald headed tattooist. Shivers ran through my body when he looked at me with heavily lidded eyes. They roamed my body and I felt Tommy pull me behind him. "My inner thigh. Agreed?"

"Fine, but lets go somewhere else." We walked out after Tommy glared the man down and walked across the street to the next tattoo parlor.

We walked out two hours later, me waddling like a duck, Tom smiling proudly at me.

"Ok that's the last time I get a tattoo." Tom just grabbed my hand and pulled me into the movie theater.

_**Just sit back and hold on, but hold on tight  
Prepare for the best and the fastest ride  
And reach out your hand, and I'll make you mine  
Everything, everything's magic**_

* * *

So it's been awhile, eh? I have become very frustrated with this fic cause I _really really_ want to change the beginning but I don't think its possible...so I am going to just going to go on with it I guess?

Also reviews are always appreciated! And thank you to those who have reviewed!

Everything's magic is Angels and Airwaves'

You belong to me is Dean Martin's

_**Preview**_

_"Ok, I'll hide under the bed."_

_"Do you think she saw it?"_

_"Are you and Sadie having sex?"_

_I fell asleep with silent tears cascading down my cheeks._


End file.
